Long list. No wife. Nervous. While my wife seems to know exactly where everything is in this abysmal place, I can never find anything – even with a detailed description of where each item is located. She's out sick so it's up to me.

Deep breath. Try to ignore the fluorescent lights sucking every bit of life energy from the soul. I begin perusing the isles slowly, carefully comparing the list to the items in the cart. Lemons, grapefruit, broccoli – forgot tomatoes... It's intense; the concentration required nearly exhausting. I weave in and out, avoiding running children, power shoppers, cell phone talkers, other people squinting - just as lost as me. Cooking oil, salad dressing, organic pasta sauce... I dodge an "earthy-crunchy" couple arguing over the organic content of different brands of pretzels. I breeze past college kids trying to look hiply bored. Cereal, rice, coffee...

I'm on edge by the time I get to frozen food. What did I forget? There's always something. Dammit. Frozen cherries, chicken pot pie...what's missing? I pass by a baby buckled in a cart; cute kid. We briefly make eye contact and his little face seems to say, "Relax guy, you've made it this far. Now – you seen my bah bah?" I cool out and round the corner to finish. Milk, orange juice, Cherry Garcia frozen yogurt...

Check again. Everything; I actually found everything.

At the check out, the girl breaks the monotonous beeping of the register: "Frozen Yogurt? Why bother? If you're gonna eat this stuff why not go all the way and just get the ice cream?" Though the point is valid, I cringe at the question because I'm concentrating on each item, going over the list again in my head. Then I remember that baby which in turn reminds me of baby daughter which reminds me why I'm here. Rearranging my face into a polite smile, I reply, "The frozen yogurt tastes better. It's creamier or something, not as heavy."

She nods, "I guess you're right", and finishes ringing up the total. With the swipe of a card, I'm out of there – mission accomplished.